The Goddess’s Favorite Creepy Movie Scenes, or Why You Should Keep Your Finger Out of That Hole in the Wall

There are a few parameters I’d like to establish with this series, now that I’ve thought about the scenes I’d like to feature and everything they have in common. As far as possible, I want to avoid including scenes that are nothing more than “jump scares.” Don’t get me wrong, these can be terribly effective when done right, and I’m not saying that I will never feature one in this series (in fact, I can already think of one or two I might want to do a writeup on at some point), but the bulk of the scenes I’ll describe will fall more into the category of subtle, creeping dread, simply because I find these types of scenes scarier and more prone to haunt the memory than scenes of shocking gore, for example (although I like my shocking gore as much as the next girl). I’ve always been of the opinion that the best horror comes completely from suggestion and atmosphere; once you’ve shown the monster in all its tentacled and bloody glory, you’ve effectively pissed the scare down your leg. Real terror comes from the not-knowing.

Additionally, I’d also like to focus more on scenes that don’t get quite as much attention as some of the better-known “scariest horror scenes.” It’s universally accepted, for instance, that many scenes from The Shining are sinister as fuck (redrum, the twins, room 237, the furry blow job, all work and no play), but since many of these appear on lists all over internet-land, I will probably refrain from beating a dead horse here. Everything I would have liked to say about these scenes has already been said better by someone else. I’m also probably going to stick with older, more “classic” films, not only because they’re the ones I tend to prefer, but also because I’m far more familiar with them as a whole.

With that housekeeping out of the way, let’s get on with the next entry in the series!

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Roman Polanski, despite his rather grave personal failings, has made some absolutely champion horror films, his particular genius lying in his portrayal of claustrophobic paranoia and spiraling descents into madness.

The Tenant (1976) was the third film in Polanski’s so-called ‘apartment trilogy,’ which also included Repulsion (1965) and Rosemary’s Baby (1968), both of which will likely turn up in this series at one time or another. The reader can check Wikipedia for a complete plot synopsis, but in brief, The Tenant is the story of a Polish immigrant, Trelkovsky (played by Polanski himself) who moves into a Paris apartment that was previously occupied by an Egyptologist named Simone who slowly went batshit and tried to end it all by leaping out of the apartment window. As the movie goes on, it becomes clear that Trelkovsky is either on his way to repeating the cycle of madness, or he has the most relentlessly malevolent neighbors on earth.

This ambiguity, also present in the other two films in the ‘trilogy,’ is one of the best aspects of The Tenant, and also one of my favorite horror themes in general. Is Trelkovsky simply losing his mind as Simone apparently did (raising the possibility that the apartment itself is somehow causing the crazy), or was there some kind of organized plot by the other tenants to eventually drive them both to suicide? Judging from what happens in the film, it could go either way, though I tend to fall into the “descending madness” camp.

Contact your physician if you notice yourself appearing in two places at once.

Contact your physician if you notice yourself appearing in two places at once.

There is really just one scene I’d like to call out, though the film is really an embarrassment of riches on this score. An atmosphere of close, dingy dread infuses every scene with jittery unease, and there is ample terror conveyed by simple shots of grungy shutters or twitching curtains. It’s bad enough that Trelkovsky has already discovered that the wardrobe in the apartment is still full of Simone’s clothes, that he can clearly see into the bathroom across the courtyard, and that the glass awning a couple floors beneath his window still bears a ragged hole where Simone’s body crashed through it. But then comes this unsettling development…

Trelkovsky is moving the wardrobe when he happens to glance out the window. He freezes. For there, standing in the bathroom window across the courtyard, is a woman. She is just standing there, staring at him. She is dressed in a long black coat and a black hat. Her face is blurred, but she looks startlingly like his crotchety landlady (played by Shelley Winters), feeding his burgeoning paranoia that the landlady and the other tenants are actively trying to freak him out. Troubled, he turns back to the wardrobe, and it’s then that he spots a hole in the wall that looks to be stuffed with a wad of cotton. He pulls the cotton out and peers into the hole with his lighter. He thinks he sees something, so he pokes his finger in there. And what he yanks out is a tooth.

A FUCKING TOOTH. A long, white canine tooth, clearly extracted at the root. Trelkovsky stares at it for a moment before dropping it into a nearby ashtray. Then, looking down at the tooth with a slightly disgusted expression on his face, he picks the tooth back up and sticks it back into the hole in the wall, and replaces the cotton.

The reason I love this scene so much is that it’s done so elegantly. There is no dialogue, and the background score (which sounds like an oboe) is suitably downbeat and eerie. Besides that, finding a vaguely squicky object left by persons unknown in a place where you weren’t expecting to find such a thing is a fantastic way of building suspense and keeping the viewer guessing. What is the tooth doing in a hole in the wall behind a wardrobe? Is it Simone’s? Did she pull it herself or did someone else do it? And why did she keep it? The imagination races to make sense of the grisly little relic. The appearance of the tooth is never fully explained, and that is what gives the scene this disquieting aura of menace.

There is a later, similar scene that I’d like to touch on as well. Trelkovsky is lying in bed, sick and slightly delirious. Eventually he leaves his apartment to visit the bathroom, making his way through the shadowed halls. When he gets there, a slow pan around the room reveals that someone has very meticulously carved hieroglyphics all over the walls. This is ominous enough to make Trelkovsky bolt from the room and hightail it back to his apartment, but when he gets back there, he glances out the window and sees someone standing in the bathroom he just left seconds before. And this someone is completely wrapped in bandages, like a mummy. Just standing there. Then, the figure slowly begins to unwrap the bandages from around her head, and it’s a weirdly smiling woman, Simone. Her smile reveals a missing canine tooth. This scene is also a great thematic callback, as not only was Simone an Egyptologist, but she was also in a full body cast the first time Trelkovsky saw her (though she died later from her injuries).

Please keep reading and I’ll keep putting these up as I think of them! You can also send me suggestions for scenes you like and why you thought they were particularly scary, or argue with me about the ones I picked. Thanks for your patronage. 😀

First in a Possible Series: The Goddess’s Favorite Creepy Movie Scenes, or Why the Fuck Does David Lynch Freak Me Out So Much?

Yesterday, as I was indulging in that great American pastime of frittering my workday away on the internet, I suddenly and quite inexplicably became obsessed with reading various publications’ rankings of the top 100 horror films and scenes. Unlike a large majority of the commenters on these pieces, I don’t so much read these types of posts to quibble with the films that were chosen or get into a lather about ones that were left off; I am, rather, simply very interested in what films other people chose and why they felt the way they did about them. The list I liked the best, incidentally, was this one from TimeOut London that was ranked according to votes from various horror heavy-hitters. It is, in my opinion, a great, diverse list that pretty equitably spans all genres and eras of horror and even threw in a few curveballs and non-traditional choices. Besides that, the recaps of the films were in-depth, informed, and insightful.

Reading all these lists inspired me to do a similar thing on this blog, though frankly I think I will stick to just calling out particular scenes in horror films that stuck with me through the years, and try to analyze why they made such an impact on me. That’s not to say that I might not do a “Goddess’s Top 100 Horror Films of All Time” one of these days, but at the moment I have a lot of other projects pending and don’t have enough free time to rewatch all the films I’d like to feature just so I can remember specifics. So consider this the first in a series of however many of my favorite creepy movie scenes that I’d like to write about. 🙂

The scene I’m going to feature first was a no-brainer for me; it was the first one that popped into my head when I decided to do this series. I have always said (to myself, mostly) that many of the scariest scenes in film don’t even come from what would normally be considered horror films. For a long time, I thought I was pretty much alone in this opinion, but then, in all my horror-list wanderings, I came across retroCRUSH’s 100 Scariest Movie Scenes. And right there, at number one, was SWEET VINDICATION.

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Winkie’s. Fucking. Diner. *shudder*

If you have not seen David Lynch’s masterful 2001 mystery Mulholland Drive, kindly do yourself a favor and get on that shit tout suite. For real, I’ll wait. It’s a sinister layer cake of creepy-awesome that rewards multiple viewings, like a rich, nightmarish puzzle that taunts you with its dark, schizophrenic glamor.

The setup of the five-minute diner scene is mundane in the extreme. Minor characters Dan (Patrick Fischler) and Herb (Michael Cooke) are sitting in Winkie’s Diner in broad daylight. Dan is telling Herb about a recurring dream he’s had that took place in the very diner they’re sitting in. It all sounds fairly humdrum until Dan says that there is a man behind the diner. “He’s the one who’s doing it,” Dan says, though he doesn’t elaborate on what ‘it’ might be. “I can see him through the wall.” He then tells Herb that he hopes he never sees the man’s face outside of a dream, with the implication that the face is too horrible for him to describe. Dan looks sweaty and intense and apprehensive as he talks, haltingly. Later in the scene, Herb takes Dan outside in an attempt to show him that the man in his dream is not really back there, and this goes about as well as you’d expect.

PEEKABOO!

PEEKABOO!

What is it about this scene that gives me the heebie-jeebies every single time I watch it? It isn’t the most obvious “scare,” the sudden appearance of the nightmare man from behind the dumpster. That’s sort of freaky when it happens, in a jump-out-of-your-seat way, but it’s not particularly dread-inducing. No, the scariest part of the scene is everything leading up to that: Dan’s strangely rubbery facial expressions and lopsided nervous grins, the flat affect of his voice as he describes the dream, the way he seems to say a great deal without saying much at all. One particular moment that actually caused a chill to rocket up my spine was when Dan was saying that Herb had also made an appearance in the dream. “You’re standing right over there…by that counter.” The camera pans slowly over to the counter, at which no one is currently standing, then focuses back on Dan’s anxious face. “You’re in both dreams, and you’re scared.” A few minutes later, Herb goes to pay for their lunch, and thus actually is standing right where Dan saw him standing in the dream. The men share an extremely unsettling glance across the diner. Also rather nerve-wracking is the men’s walk out to the dumpster behind the diner. Every shot, every camera angle, every edit as they walk seems pointedly calculated to be as skin-crawlingly sinister as possible, but without being obvious or overtly frightening in any way. It’s a fantastic trick, and I wish I could figure out how Lynch so effortlessly achieved it.

The retroCRUSH rundown also pointed out that this scene should absolutely not be as eerie as it is, because Dan basically describes exactly what’s going to happen, and then it happens. Normally structuring a scene like that would only serve to take away any tension, but in this scene it’s precisely the opposite. There is an inevitability to the scene; both Dan and the viewer know that something bad is going to happen, but neither are able to prevent it, and the dread the viewer feels in Dan’s stead makes the scene, for me at least, very difficult to watch without looking away.

I am amazed that Lynch managed to film such an ominous scene out of elements that are anything but scary at first glance (other than the nightmare man’s horrible face, that is), but I’m even more amazed by the fact that he’s done it more than once. Lynch is a master at something I tend to call time displacement, for lack of a better term. He has filmed several scenes in which the line between reality and nightmare is blurred, of course, but he also seems to have a similar predilection for playing with overlapping timescales, characters being in two places at once, and that type of thing. In 2006’s Inland Empire, for example, the intensely freaky-looking Grace Zabriskie (as Visitor #1) points to an empty couch in Laura Dern’s house and tells her that if it was tomorrow, she would be sitting right. Over. There. And then suddenly it is tomorrow, and Laura Dern is sitting exactly where the old woman said she’d be sitting. There is also the famous scene from Lost Highway (1997), where a white-faced Robert Blake tells Bill Pullman that not only is he standing there talking to him, but at the same time, “I’m at your house right now.” Every single scene Lynch has filmed like this has freaked me right the hell out, and I can’t quite put my finger on why that might be. Perhaps because when done well, these scenes serve to undermine the fulcrum of reality and make the viewer feel completely adrift in a universe that makes no rational sense. Or maybe it’s the fact that Lynch, better than any other filmmaker in my opinion, is cursedly skilled at portraying the incongruity of dreams on film, so that we almost feel as though he’s directly tapped into our collective subconscious and forced us to look unflinchingly at what’s lurking there. Or it could be his consummate talent for utilizing slightly off-kilter facial expressions, camera shots, voice inflections, and background sounds to convey an unsettling mood. Whatever the reason, I suppose it just goes to show that in the right hands, traditional horror movie monsters and situations have nothing on a simple shot of the back of someone’s head, or a strangely intense glance, or a daylight stroll through a diner parking lot.

The Antwerp Diamond Center Heist

In 2003, a gang of thieves made the largest haul in history, and many details of how they did it remain a mystery. The original article I wrote can be found here.

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The Diamond District in Antwerp, Belgium is the site of approximately 80% of all diamond transactions in the world. Covering only about three blocks and containing numerous office buildings and shops specializing in various gem services, the Diamond District benefits from almost impenetrable security; streets are blanketed with constant surveillance, and the area is cordoned off by retractable stone pillars. It’s rumored that even the Mafia turned down the chance to pull a heist there because the security was simply too good. But on Valentine’s Day weekend in 2003, thieves managed to do the seemingly impossible: They made off with half a billion dollars in loot using neither weapons nor violence, but only their brains, endless patience, and a few simple tools.

Casing the Antwerp Diamond Center

One of several office blocks in the district, the Antwerp Diamond Center was chosen for the heist because even though its security was formidable, the thieves thought there might be chinks in the armor that could be exploited. Leonardo Notarbartolo, an Italian jewelry designer and merchant as well as a criminal, traveled to Belgium and rented an office in the Antwerp Diamond Center, posing as a legitimate businessman. Had the building superintendent thought to check Notarbartolo’s background, she might have discovered the man’s long criminal record in Italy. But his references were not checked, one of several lucky breaks the thieves would enjoy.

Notarbartolo spent over two years pretending to work in his office in the center. Using a bag concealing a camera, he filmed the relevant parts of the building, including the vault and the various security measures. He took copious notes about employee schedules, brand names of locks and safes, and the building layout, even managing to get a copy of the blueprints. Periodically, he would take the information back to Italy and show it to his loose group of confederates, known as the School of Turin. Over the course of two years, the videos and information supplied by the inside man helped the gang work out ways around each of the building’s security measures.

Stealing Half a Billion Dollars

In the middle of the night on February 15, 2003, the group entered through the garage of the Antwerp Diamond Center using a remote control they’d made after utilizing a frequency detector to home in on the garage opener’s code. The garage faced the outside of the district, which was only sparsely covered by video surveillance. The basement vault, containing almost 200 safety deposit boxes used by merchants with offices in the building, was protected by a foot-thick steel door with a key lock, a combination, and a magnetic alarm. A few days before the heist, a member of the gang posing as a workman had disabled the magnetic alarm. Notarbartolo, from his two years “working” in the building, knew where to find the key, but had apparently never managed to discover the vault’s combination. Luck was with the thieves again, though; whoever had locked the vault for the weekend had neglected to “scramble” the combination after closing the door, so the key alone gave the thieves access to the untold riches within.

Inside the Vault

The gang disabled the light, motion and heat sensors using cheap but ingenious methods — clear hairspray, electrical tape, a block of styrofoam on a broom handle. The vault was also equipped with seismic detectors that would be set off by drilling or by someone trying to tunnel into the vault through the concrete. But these thieves didn’t need to drill into the safety deposit box doors because they’d had a machinist make them a specialized tool that would pry most of the boxes open quite handily.

More Loot Than They Could Carry

The safety deposit boxes were so stuffed with riches that the thieves simply left a great deal of it scattered on the floor because it was too much for them to take. They focused on loose diamonds, cash in various currencies, and gold bars; they left behind distinctive pieces of jewelry that could be easily identified, as well as less valuable gemstones. Estimates vary, but it’s thought that the value of cash, gold and gems stolen amounted to between 100 and 400 million euros (about half a billion dollars), making it the largest heist in history.

Catching the School of Turin

Before leaving the building, the thieves stole the security tapes recording the night’s adventures. They exited through the garage with their bags of loot, attracting no attention whatsoever in the deserted district. After meeting briefly to sort out their take, they filled several bags with trash, including clothes and tools from the heist, destroyed security tapes, less common paper currencies that might arouse suspicion when exchanged, and even a few cheap emeralds. The trash bags were dumped in a remote patch of forest as one of the gang members drove out of Belgium.

The thieves’ luck had finally run out. The forest was patrolled by an obsessive caretaker, who happened upon the trash bags less than 48 hours after the robbery. The presence of gems and currency in the garbage tied it to the heist, and from DNA evidence gleaned from champagne bottles and other household trash mixed in with the discards from the heist, police were able to identify four of the thieves, including Notarbartolo. All were eventually jailed, but have since been released. Other members of the gang have never been identified or apprehended, and the loot has never been recovered.

Source:

Selby, Scott Andrew, and Greg Campbell. Flawless: Inside the Largest Diamond Heist in History. New York: Union Square, 2010. Print.

The Greatest Unsolved Art Thefts

While most of the thousands of art thefts around the world are solved rather quickly, a few cases have proved frustrating for authorities. The original article I wrote can be found here.

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According to the Association for Research into Crimes Against Art (ARCA), art theft is the third most lucrative criminal enterprise after drug trafficking and arms dealing. Though the public may think of the thieves as isolated and obsessed art lovers, the reality is that the vast majority of stolen art is taken by agents of organized crime syndicates for the purposes of ransom, negotiation, or funding of other criminal activities, such as terrorism.

Italy is the nation with the most art thefts by far — roughly 25,000 per year, leaving second-place Russia in the dust, with a “mere” 2,000 artworks stolen per year. In many cases, the thieves are apprehended and the artwork is recovered in relatively short order. In a few infamous cases, however, priceless artworks remain missing, and criminals remain at large.

The Isabella Stewart Gardner Museum

Very early on the morning of March 18, 1990, two white males in police uniforms showed up at the side entrance of the Isabella Stewart Gardner Museum in Boston, Massachusetts. They claimed they had received a disturbance call; museum guards let them in. The phony police officers, who appeared to be unarmed, overpowered the guards, tied them up, and locked them in the basement. Then, for the next hour and a half, the thieves proceeded to filch several valuable and irreplaceable works of art, simply cutting the paintings neatly from their frames.

Among the stolen artworks were Vermeer’s The Concert, Manet’s Chez Tortoni, and three works by Rembrandt, including his only marine-themed painting, The Storm on the Sea of Galilee. The two men also made off with five Degas drawings, a painting by Govaert Flinck, and a bronze beaker from the Chinese Shang Dynasty. Altogether, the works have an estimated value of $300 million. The FBI worked diligently to find the perpetrators, following several leads, a few of which hinted at the involvement of the IRA. Despite their efforts, and the $5 million reward offered for return of the artwork, the empty frames of the stolen masterpieces still hang on the walls of the Isabella Stewart Gardner Museum, nearly two decades later.

The Ashmolean Museum, Oxford

Sometime during the New Year’s revelry surrounding the transition from 1999 to 2000, thieves crept through some continuing construction work and broke the glass ceiling of the Ashmolean Museum in Oxford, England. They lowered themselves to the floor on rope ladders and snatched the museum’s only Cézanne, a painting called Auvers-sur-Oise, valued at nearly $5 million. The Ashmolean was founded in 1683, making it the oldest public museum in the world, and through the years it has seen its fair share of thefts, both attempted and successful. The security had been beefed up in 1992, but this measure did not prevent the loss of the prized Cézanne, which is still missing.

The Van Gogh Museum, Amsterdam

Two paintings by Vincent Van Gogh — View of the Sea at Scheveningen and Congregation Leaving the Reformed Church in Nuenen — were swiped in December 2002 by two men who broke in through the roof of the building. The men were caught and convicted only a year later, but of the two paintings, valued at about $30 million, there has been no sign.

A Catch-All of More Top Art Thefts

  • In February 2006, four armed men stormed into the Museu Chacara do Ceu in Rio de Janeiro and made off with four modern masterpieces by Dali, Matisse, Picasso and Monet.
  • A Cavalier, a self-portrait by Dutch master Frans Van Mieris valued at $1 million, was stolen in June 2007 from the Art Gallery of New South Wales, Sydney, Australia, while the gallery was open to the public.
  • Two oil paintings by Maxfield Parrish were cut from their frames and taken from a gallery in West Hollywood, California in July 2002. The paintings, part of a series commissioned by Gertrude Vanderbilt Whitney, are valued at $4 million.
  • In February 2008, four paintings were stolen from the E.G. Bührle Collection in Zurich, Switzerland. Two were recovered, but Count Lepic and His Daughters by Degas and Boy in the Red Vest by Cézanne are still missing.
  • Caravaggio’s Nativity with San Lorenzo and San Francesco, worth $20 million, was taken from the Oratory of San Lorenzo in Palermo, Italy in October 1969. Its whereabouts are still unknown forty years later.

The FBI maintains files on all these crimes and more.

Counterfeiter William Chaloner, Busted by Sir Isaac Newton

William Chaloner made a fortune forging coins and paper money, but met his match in the greatest mind of the age. The original article I wrote can be found here.

Sir_Isaac_Newton_by_Sir_Godfrey_Kneller,_Bt

Born sometime between 1650 and 1665 in the English county of Warwickshire, William Chaloner was apparently a natural criminal, and used his amoral wiles and gift for persuasion to (briefly) live the life of a gentleman. In and out of prison several times, adept at playing two sides against one another, the man was finally brought to heel in 1699 by the then Master of the Royal Mint, a man who had also proven himself one of the greatest scientific minds of all time, Sir Isaac Newton.

Anatomy of a Counterfeiter

The adolescent William Chaloner was evidently as incorrigible as his adult counterpart would prove to be, and when his parents found they could not control him, they sent him away to Birmingham to apprentice to a nail-maker. At the time, Birmingham was known for more than making nails, however; it was also a hotbed of coin forging, particularly of the small silver “groat,” worth about four pennies. Chaloner proved an apt pupil and was soon churning out “Birmingham groats” with the best of them.

Such small-time jobs didn’t quite suit Chaloner’s naked ambition, though, so around 1680 he struck out on foot for London. Once there he found it difficult to break into the insular criminal underworld, so he scraped by selling tin toy watches that evidently had sex toys attached. Around this time he might have married and fathered several children, though records are unclear. He also seems to have begun a slightly more lucrative scam of selling quack medicines to desperate tuberculosis, plague, and malaria sufferers. In addition, he started working with accomplices to rob people and then collect a reward from the unfortunate victims for the return of the stolen merchandise. It was robbery, in fact, that marked Chaloner’s first appearance in the arrest record in 1690.

Counterfeiting Coins

Forgery of currency was rampant in 17th-century England, largely because the hand-struck coins issued from the legitimate Mint were non-standard and prone to having metal clipped off their edges. 1662 saw the advent of machine-struck coins whose carefully measured weights and milled edges would ostensibly make them harder to fake. Of course forgers were not discouraged in the slightest, and by the mid-1690s it’s estimated that ten percent of the coins in circulation in England were forgeries. This problem, compounded by an arbitrage market in English silver, eventually led to the establishment of the Bank of England and the introduction of the paper bank note. Its immediate effect, however, was the hiring of scientist Isaac Newton to oversee the Royal Mint. Though he had no particular experience in finance, he took to his new post with his trademark intelligence and rigor.

William Chaloner’s Forging Fortunes

Chaloner, meanwhile, had perfected the fine art of counterfeiting coins from goldsmith Patrick Coffee (or Coffey). Soon he was forging French pistoles and English guineas, and using confederates to pass the fakes into circulation. His clever coins made for a lucrative business, and he was soon able to buy a grand country house in Knightsbridge and pass himself off as a wealthy gentleman. He went on to master the art of forging machine-struck coins using small and easily hidden stamps.

Ambitious and overconfident, Chaloner next tried to undermine to Royal Mint itself. He published pamphlets claiming corruption within the ranks, and gave suggestions for how the institution could overcome its problems. He even attempted to gain a position at the Mint, but was unsuccessful.

Chaloner the Prison Snitch

The counterfeiter’s activities began to draw unwanted attention, especially from Isaac Newton, who Chaloner had directly insulted by implicating him in Mint corruption. In 1696 Chaloner was arrested and sent to the notorious Newgate prison, but he walked free by ratting out several of his counterfeiting colleagues, and by raising doubts about conditions at the Mint.

While Chaloner was petitioning Parliament for a position inside the Mint, Newton happened to spot him, and generated another arrest. This time Chaloner was imprisoned at Newgate for almost two months before walking free once again.

Chaloner’s Other Scams

In addition to counterfeiting coins, Chaloner also had a hand in many other criminal enterprises. In one scam, he would convince reluctant printers to run off copies of Jacobite propaganda, then report the printers to authorities and collect the reward. He also began forging the new Bank of England paper notes, and printing fake “malt lottery” tickets that could be redeemed for cash. During all these shenanigans, he mostly stayed out of jail by turning King’s evidence against his confederates.

Chaloner’s Trial and Execution

Isaac Newton certainly hadn’t taken Chaloner’s accusations of corruption lightly, and by the end of the 17th century he had used his formidable intellect and vast number of contacts in the criminal underworld to build an airtight case against the arrogant counterfeiter. Chaloner finally stood trial in March of 1699, and though he vehemently argued his innocence, Newton had amassed several witnesses who attested to Chaloner’s long criminal history. The judge took little time in finding Chaloner guilty and sentencing him to death; counterfeiting money was considered treason, an offense against the Crown. Chaloner was sent back to Newgate to await execution, and in his desperation he faked madness, and then drafted many self-serving letters to Isaac Newton himself, none of which Newton seems to have answered. All Chaloner’s antics were for naught; he was hanged on March 16, 1699 at the gallows in Tyburn.

Source:

Levenson, Thomas (2009). Newton and the Counterfeiter: The Unknown Detective Career of the World’s Greatest Scientist. Faber & Faber. ISBN: 0571229921.

Inquisitions of the Middle Ages

For nearly six centuries, the Catholic Church operated a series of inquisitions for the purpose of wiping out heresy and witchcraft. The original article I wrote can be found here.

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Though the Inquisition is generally thought of as as a single organization or series of events, there were, in fact, several inquisitions occurring throughout most of Europe during the Middle Ages. In practice, the Catholic Church operated the various inquisitions almost like a franchise, with inquisitors being sent to different areas to establish offices for the purpose of rooting out heresy, sorcery, and various other perceived wrongdoings. And while the public might have an idea of the Inquisition as a crackdown on witchcraft, the earliest manifestations targeted mainly other, supposedly heretical, branches of Christianity.

The Early Inquisitions

Though the Catholic Church had, before the 12th century, considered heresy a crime that could be punished with imprisonment, it wasn’t until roughly 1140 — with the spread of the heretical Christian sect called the Cathars — that the church began taking the threat more seriously. The first of the so-called “Medieval Inquisitions” was established in 1184 by papal bull, and soon thereafter inquisitors were sent to parts of Italy and France to deal with new religious movements, including the Cathars, the Bogomils, and the Waldensians. While these were all Christian sects, their beliefs strayed from Catholic orthodoxy; the Cathars, for example, believed in both a good and evil God, and since the evil God had created the earth, everything material in the world was to be avoided as far as possible. Dominicans and Franciscans, who were generally also considered heretics because of their belief in the corruption of the Church, were not persecuted, and in fact were recruited by Pope Innocent III into the cause of the inquisition. The Knights Templar, on the other hand, who had long been valued allies of the Catholic Church, were ruthlessly targeted, possibly due to political maneuvering by French king Philip the Fair, who wanted to get his hands on their vast wealth.

Methods of the Inquisition

A 1252 papal bull authorized the use of torture by inquisitors. The various methods of torture — including strappado, the rack, and simulated drowning — were meant not as punishment, but to encourage confession of one’s crimes, and more importantly, to implicate others who could then be hauled in by authorities and subjected to the same treatment. Once an accused heretic was brought in for questioning, there was little he or she could do to win freedom. Even a confession was considered unsatisfactory without the naming of names. The accused had no right to an attorney, could be held indefinitely, and was never told what the charges against him or her were, or who had made the accusations. Torture would be applied until the “heretic” had confessed, though the confession had to be repeated later, so that the Church could avoid charges that the confession had been forced under duress. If execution was called for, the heretic was handed over to secular authorities to keep the Church’s hands clean. Once the execution had been carried out — usually by burning alive, though the victim might be strangled before the fire was lit if he or she had repented the crime — the victim’s property and assets would be confiscated and remanded to Church authorities, often leaving the family of the “heretic” destitute. And death itself was often no barrier to the Church’s investigations, as several supposed heretics who had died as much as fifty years before were sometimes dug up, paraded through the streets, and burned at the stake. The relatives of this unfortunate corpse were then stripped of their assets.

The Spanish Inquisition

Perhaps the best known of the inquisitions due to its mentions in popular culture, the Spanish Inquisition was also little concerned with sorcery or witchcraft. This particular inquisition — established in 1478 at the behest of King Ferdinand and Queen Isabella, with the help of Pope Sixtus IV — almost exclusively targeted Jews and Muslims who had converted to Christianity and were suspected of carrying on the rituals of their previous religions in secret. Known as Marranos or conversos, Jews who were observed changing their underclothes on Saturday or refraining from eating pork were duly reported, as were Moriscos, or “secret Muslims,” who were caught doing something as harmless as eating couscous. Later targets of the Spanish Inquisition included Protestants and members of the Greek Orthodox Church. This particular inquisition operated most everywhere the Spaniards conquered, including Peru, Mexico and Guatemala, and continued operating until about 1821.

Witch Hunts

Witchcraft and the Inquisition are inseparably intertwined in the popular imagination, probably due to the presence of horrifying texts such as the 1486 Malleus Maleficarum, but the fact remains that those accused of witchcraft or sorcery made up only a fraction of victims. Those accused tended to be female, single, aged and ugly; anyone exhibiting personal eccentricities in dress or manner were also suspected, as were midwives. Moreover, people accused of witchcraft were often tried by civil courts, as the local inquisitions perceived more of a threat from heretics than witches.

Additional Source:

Kirsch, Jonathan (2008). The Grand Inquisitor’s Manual: A History of Terror in the Name of God. HarperOne. ISBN 978-0060816995.

History of the Hope Diamond

Though claims of its infamous curse are fictitious, the Hope Diamond nonetheless has a history filled with intrigue and mystery. The original article I wrote can be found here.

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Glinting brilliantly from within its setting of 16 white diamonds, the fabulous 45.52-carat blue gem (which fluoresces red under ultraviolet light) known today as the Hope Diamond draws millions of curious visitors to the National Museum of Natural History at the Smithsonian Institution. It is likely that many of the visitors flocking around its bulletproof glass case have heard tales of the misfortune that befell anyone who owned the supposedly cursed stone. These stories are largely exaggerated, but the history of the Hope Diamond is still a fascinating journey through revolution, crime, and the tangled fates of kings and tycoons.

The Mysterious Appearance of the “Tavernier Blue”

The first definitive record of the stone that would become the Hope Diamond occurs in 1669, when French merchant Jean-Baptiste Tavernier sold it, along with about 1,000 other diamonds, to King Louis XIV. Tavernier never specified where he obtained the gem, which then measured a whopping 115 carats, but over the years a legend arose that he stole it from the eye of a statue of the Hindu goddess Sita. While this is almost surely false, current scholarship estimates the diamond was probably found in the Kollur mine in India, and was obtained by Tavernier between 1640 and 1667.

The Blue Diamond of the Crown

For many years thereafter, the famous blue gem would reside in the exalted pantheon of the French crown jewels, and it became known colloquially as the French Blue. Louis XIV had the stone set in gold and wore it on a ribbon for ceremonial occasions, while his successor, Louis XV, set the Blue in a jewelled pendant in 1749, in a design commemorating the Order of the Golden Fleece. There the gem remained until 1792.

The French Blue Stolen

At the cusp of the French Revolution, the Royal Storehouse was robbed by an ever-expanding gang of thieves. Nearly all of the French crown jewels disappeared, including the French Blue, which didn’t turn up again until 1812, incidentally right after the 20-year statute of limitations on the theft had run out. London diamond merchant Daniel Eliason was now the lucky owner of the gem, perhaps obtained after a brief stint in the possession of British monarch George IV.

The Hope Gets Its Name and a Curse

Presumably, Henry Philip Hope bought the stone from Eliason sometime before 1839. At this point the gem had been cut down to nearly its present size, and placed in a medallion often worn on a necklace by Hope’s sister-in-law Louisa Beresford. The gem passed down the Hope family line, making brief appearances at exhibitions in London (in 1851) and Paris (in 1855). Lord Henry Francis Hope Pelham-Clinton Hope received the diamond as part of his legacy in 1887; his American wife, May Yohe, later wrote and starred in a serial where she exaggerated upon stories of the blue gem’s supposed curse, all of which were completely spurious.

From Cartier to the Smithsonian

After Lord Francis divorced May Yohe in 1902, he sold the Hope to a London merchant for £29,000, who then sold it to a New York dealer. It made a brief detour to Turkey as part of the collection of Sultan Abdul Hamid, then traveled back to Paris where it ended up in the possession of Pierre Cartier. The famous diamond merchant sold it to American socialite Evalyn Walsh McLean in 1910, after placing it in a more modern setting. McLean wore it often, and left it to her grandchildren when she died in 1947, though the stone was sold to settle debts two years later. The next owner, Harry Winston, after taking the gem on tours of the U.S. and showing it at charity balls along with other famous gemstones, donated it to the Smithsonian in 1958, sending it through the regular mail in a brown paper bag. The gem has been on display there ever since, other than when it was briefly loaned to other museums, and today it can be seen in all its glory in its own rotating glass case, the lighting of which was specifically engineered to show the diamond’s blue brilliance to best effect.

Additional Source:

Fowler, Marian (2002). Hope: Adventures of a Diamond. Diane Pub Co. ISBN 0756767040.